Julio Navarrete
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I See Him


I met someone. The same person. With a different name, a different face, but the same person. He appears and then hides, he stays and the leaves, but in the end it's always the same person.

He's tall. Skin the color of caramel and eyes brighter than a full moon. Could it be? We dance, all night long we dance to the rhythm of sugar-free redbull and vodka. We kiss. Says he likes my smile. He works at the coffee shop down the street from my house. Makes the best latte with extra foam. One look at his hypnotizing smile and I struggle to contain my joy. He exercises at my gym. We make eye contact. For over a month we communicate through our eyes. We date. He garnishes my room with a thousand roses. We shower each other with affection and a million kisses. But there's one condition; I'm not allowed to fall in love.

My body becomes a dark sky thirsty for light. A ruined temple. The outcome of a devastating crash between you and I. The burning passion is extinguished into nothing more than ashes. And in the ashes, I see him.

I see him in the fresh morning dew of a warm Summer day. I see him in the cool April sunset coated with pinks, purples and yellows. I see him in the thick white foam on my extra hot latte. He makes my heart smile. I feel him in the cool evening breeze and beneath a fresh cascade. In my dreams, we're in love. In my nightmares, we're invincible. I feel him when I lay my head on my pillow, when I cocoon myself in my sheets. I see his truth in the shooting stars that awaken the night sky. He makes my soul complete. I hear him in the soothing waves caressing the sand at the beach. He exists. The welcoming smile of a stranger walking past me down the street tells me so. He exists. 

I find him.

And suddenly every moment is here and now; the past, the present and the future. I'm an innocent child, a fragile adolescent, a busy adult and a senile old man, all at once. When I'm with you, I can't distinguish between my dreams and our reality. I breathe you in. Your sweet aroma fills me. It's remained intact since the last time I saw you. I melt into your lips. Your sweet, soft lips lift me off my feet and into your arms. Your brown skin like milk chocolate melting slowly on my tongue. I see us side by side, grey hair, weakened joints, growing old together. I feel love sparking out of each and every pore, and I yearn to drink from your hands, fall into your heart and heal every breathing wound within. Breathe me in! Take me in into your soul where I know that I belong.
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